lost smile in my face :(

This morning I felt a little sad, feeling down, so to see him as still doubt all of this love, but I will remain silent, and see what will happen tomorrow, today I immediately can not smile as usual, love is back hurt me slowly slowly, which I loved, and I was afraid of losing him, oh Lord only you know it all, give us a way to be together peacefully, if indeed he was the last man in my life, but I'll save the most enduring in the hearts diary one word, I love him, even if we can not unite in this life may we meet in later life,, merry xmas,, for all my lovely friend,,for me xmas, or all Big day all same, not have any party, or with someone special, we have quiet xmas,quiet weekend, from long time ago,,,

story my life

good morning everyone, I'm from Indonesia hemisphere, my name Jasmine Than,, the name jasmine fragrant small flowers, white, but my name was not like jasmine,, my very personal life was far different fate with jasmine flowers, I'm a single mom, with 2 girls, most of her 19 years, and studying at university obstetrics, a small elementary school entry this year, most major my child it myself but I'm not child adoption since she was 4 years old, but I love her  like my own child , my life pretty difficult, but we can survive with a welcoming smile and the next day with renewed hope, yes I was married, for 5 years, but during the 5 years that I lived like in prison, I can not smile, not free to do what I want, and in year 6, the end all was revealed, my husband has a wife and 2 children, then I can only say, O LORD, is whether the answer during this time he made ​​me bow make me like living doll, I'm not helpless, even for I do not have the courage to speak, because I already have child from our drama marriage,since that time, i close my heart door for all man, who just can use me for object ,    embedded in my heart only hatred, revenge, because I thought all men were equal, they just take advantage, for their own interests, even his life completing his sex life,but this last year i have fell diffrent in my heart,when i meet somebody, yeah he just online guy, who i know him in website chatting paltalk,but i know his it real,i can feel what it called LOVE,     after all this time I feel lonely, cold in this heart, but once I met him I felt my life again, although this is only the imagine,   I hope, God Bless this love, and give me a new path in this new year, I know he's far away, in parts of the world that I had never stepped on, the sounds  are funny, fall in love online, but believe it or not it up, I felt a sense of how beautiful it is, ,yesssssss I LOVE him, when this just dream,, but this to amazing for i awake, i will never force anyone to love me,i can give my love life, without i take something from them,merry xmas,, my lover wish all the best there with u, my (Adrians)i to shy writing his name, coz i not want make his, shy,dohhhhhh,,GOD help me,    

restles,

I slept pretty soundly last night, I woke up my ingredients can be a very strange dream, so I woke up I felt something had happened, which I myself do not know what, I'm confused, restless, but I pray, Lord, may I not be fooled again with feeling this love, this feeling is only temporary if you give it, better get rid of all these flavors, before I already love, I'm afraid of getting hurt, I'm afraid to cry again just because he, oh Lord, keep the person I love, and keep this feeling do not let me hurt again!!!

last night,

Uh, today I've made mistakes, which makes him upset and could not sleep, I know I'm wrong, but I know what I'm doing, well occasionally we make it a reasonable one, hehe,, i fell sorry my love, make u disapointed,,

i promise not do that again love u for somebody else there,,, night night all friend,, sleeppppppp,

but I do not know if he loves me or not, but all I know, if I love someone I did not expect it, he loves me, i can feel happy when i see him, i can give all my life,, to be with him, i can give, without i take, I want to keep these feelings, too beautiful for me to wake up from this dream,

my day start with smile face

been almost a month, I knew a man, he's good, handsome and dignified, we spent much time together, joking, and occasionally kissing hahaha, although only in on the cam, I can feel, hangantnya kiss, make me forget that he just a guy online, but it's been so long, I forgot how, love it, now I feel it again, Lord do not you take him from me again, let me feel, though it's just online, I tu you must not dream, but this dream too beautiful for me awake, and I love

Start my new life

my weekend was amazing,,,this my new life,