I got my courage for someone I never met

Ah, finally has been so long I play on the internet, I met someone who could give me smiling in my face, bring me to the world that I never feel happy, although that's life squad the internet, but I felt it was more beautiful than my real life, I can laugh happily , smiling, feeling ashamed whether I fall in love, ahh is not possible because of the feelings stored in my heart, I just hate being called a man, but what's really weird with my feeling is, why do I feel peaceful when I speak and just see it in the camera, I feel he's real, I could feel the happiness that I have not felt what love beauty, but still I could not trust my heart again closed, and the embedded just revenge, how all men can feel my pain, but it turns out he man I met online that he was able to soften my feelings, I get all my courage to fight my husband that his behavior increasingly crazy,I was hiding who I was, I did not want him to leave me if he knows who I am, but at that point I had not seen my husband again, since that time we fight he did not see me anymore, but his wife is crazy it does not stop terrorizing me, by threatening she would kidnap my child and more , if I did not let go of my husband, Lord I ask where the justice for me, I'm just an innocent girl who have dream just have a husband and live simply, it turns out I have to live in a marriage full of lies , with a gangster, and I have to give my husband to another woman, and I'm still treated unfairly with them always threatening to take my child, 2 months already I knew the man who fills my day today, giving me encouragement, without his knowing it I learned from all that she told and from all the blogs that he wrote about he's life, my courage arises for an immediate end to all the shit that I lived for many years, all the falseness of smiles, repeatedly whether I think what he's someone that is right for me just tell about my life, but many times also I think, I do not want to know who I am with him and then he stopped talking to me,to the top where I could not resist all, pain, hatred, I ventured to write down everything that happened to me, ehh that time I had returned to work at the firm friend of my husband, but she seized it, the wife of my husband does not like me working place his friend, ahhh slut, I said I would not die with the loss of job,
    Finally, I write down everything that has been a burden, and I already know all the risks, I could lose him, which has been a friend when I'm sad, but let the world know who she named JASMINE,,, by writing a blog in I feel relieved , freely I tell all my complaints, no matter who I read, and perhaps of them think I'm stupid woman who for the sake of the family I'm willing to pawn my happiness for the sake of my family life and the feasibility of two daughters~~not fhinish yet~~~ i will keep writing tomorrow because now i have more time at home,,and well you can reading the end this story in my down blog,,,and u will know who a guy, BRING ME IN ANOTHER WORLD AND HE CHANGE MY MIND CHANGE HOW I NEED LIFE WHERE I CAN STAND IN MY OWN FEET WITHOUT WORRY,~~~

Suffering without end :(, part 3

Not enough he robbed my life, my liberty as a human, he treats me like, a prostitute who must be ready to serve him when he wants to fuck me, oh god,, 8 years have I spent this helpless life for the sake of my two daughters, I should close my eyes and my heart to just jealous when i saw happiness with his wife and son are there, how much it hurt, where again I had to hide on who else I have to tell because no one will understand, my suffering, which they think I'm happy, I'm perfect enough to hide a secret this, even my parents where they want to care about what I experienced that they think I gave them enugh money and that make them happy,Finally I know who who he is for this I think is a husband, he was a gangster in korea also in china, and now he is in power in Jakarta, oh god,, I'm stuck, but who should I blame, was behind the company and life of luxury. he has business ilegal who he has sold luxury cars,!.and more severe he could not and would never leave me, and would kill me if he knows I have a lover ~ ~ ~
   Long story short my life like hell, with all the pressure that still I get from my parents I had to save his own suffering and pretend to deceive others also myself that I'm happy,Ahhh, I'm Jasmine, a woman who now has become a mother of two daughters, I'm now 32 years old, who always tried to give a smile and I do hope everyone who can make others happy behind the suffering, it is enough to give me a fake smile, it feels I just hurt my own feelings, It was time I should wake up and struggle to defend what my rights as a human being, for 9 years I kept my own hatred of the man, I finally met a man who accidentally meet in a site online we chatt room, ahhhh I just fill my free time to play the Internet, there is little feeling entertained with my loneliness, I can joke, talk with friends from various countries, perfectly well who I was before I hide my friends, four years did not feel I was wallowing in my life virtual world, without the impression which means only a game when I needed a friend, because I do not have a friend of total in my real life who alwasy i get control from my husband and his bodyguar,they keep eyes on me where i go and with who i talking with,I just feel the freedom even in cyberspace, he knows that I mengahiskan playing time with the internet, and shittt he came over and slammed my laptop, what a bad asshole, he hit my face but I was away and I took a knife and I show once again you hurt him who will die you or me, like a demon, perhaps because it was too long I keep all this hatred like a time bomb ready to explode at any time, have lost all my fear, which I think how much I hated there before me a man who has destroyed my life and now he is harass me what is the place to spend a little happiness, my new world, I stab the knife into her body, but he had his hand away and just about shit he finally went to the hospital without a fight I,and i get new laptop,, ahhh i back,,,